Category: Mindset

The Mindset of Failing

28 Days of Writing, MindsetPublished onUpdated on8 Comments on The Mindset of Failing

Failing at tennis - ading to a growth mindset

Learning about sport when I was young mainly involved cricket and football, I never really experienced tennis. My son has been playing since he was about 4 and this season has been enjoying playing as part of a local team in a Junior Competition every Saturday. I think he is experiencing what failing feels like through his time playing tennis.

I have been getting to know what it is like being a tennis Dad this season and watching a lot of tennis, naturally. One thing you notice with this sport compared to football is the number of small victories and failures there are. It is much more about the cumulative effort, gradually building up points, overcoming the failures you experience.

If you play tennis you will know that failure and winning/losing points is an integral part of this sport. This is different to the experience of football I had growing up, where the end result was the only thing that mattered, there were not many measures of progress. Sure you could tell which team was dominating play, but it was not as clear as you win a point or you lose a point.

I have always found it fascinating that in tennis you could be one point from defeat and yet still come back to win a match. My son starting his match today losing 3 early games and before long he was losing 4-2, but he suddenly woke up and won the remaining 4 on the bounce to win 6-4.

Do multiple small setbacks during tennis create a more resilient approach? I wonder if the mindset of a tennis player sees failing and losing differently to a football player?

Finding the Strength to Say “Yes”

Leadership, MindsetPublished onUpdated on4 Comments on Finding the Strength to Say “Yes”

“Remember, you cannot be both young and wise. Young people who pretend to be wise to the ways of the world are mostly just cynics. Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. Because cynics don’t learn anything. Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness, a rejection of the world because we are afraid it will hurt us or disappoint us. Cynics always say no. But saying “yes” begins things. Saying “yes” is how things grow. Saying “yes” leads to knowledge. “Yes” is for young people. So for as long as you have the strength to, say “yes’.”

– Stephen Colbert, Knox College Commencement Address, 2006.

During my time running workshops and professional development there is always this interesting first few hours of work together. If the group size is large enough this can largely continue anonymously, as people weigh you up and digest what you are saying. Sometimes it is more overt as you learn more about each other. If you have ever run professional development sessions you will know the feeling.

In both instances I see Stephen Colbert’s words manifesting themselves before me. Those people who are ready to say “Yes”, to jump in, to learn, to be open to a challenge and new ideas and ultimately to go away and try.

And there are those who say “No”, who step back from the edge, who close off to anything new and are averse to a challenge and who ultimately will always do what they have always done.

Of course it is not as simple as turning your back on those who react in the negative. Perhaps sometimes we need to help people to find the strength, as Colbert suggests, to turn their “No” into a “Yes”, and take that step off the ledge for the very first time.